Why you can't let go of your one night stand

This could have many titles....
Why break up sex is bad for you.
Why you never have sex on a first date.
Why you still think of him all the time when he has let go of you.


Sex is such a touchy subject. Countless times I talked to women who tell me that they slept with 'him' on a first date and they ask if he will call again. Sure maybe for more sex. Some women think they can create an intimacy with 'him' that will lead to a relationship by having sex on a first date. When he does not call they get angry and hurt. I had SEX with him, I liked him that much! They feel robbed as though he stole something precious. If it was that precious, why did you give it away so freely? Did it have no value to you? Why should he or anyone think you value your body?

One of my psychic friends and I were discussing this and this was what a psychologist told her when she was having a hard time letting go of an relationship.

The reason women get "addicted" to a one night stands or to a man is because we, as women, take energy in (during sex). Men have all their "stuff" outside, they expel (INTO US LITERALLY) their energy. If you do not know the man (the energy) you're taking into your body, you are taking that inside yourself physically, and have no idea what it is or who he is. The result of which, is you end up carrying him/and that energy you know nothing about, around inside you.

It takes a FULL MOON Cycle (Menstrual cycle, 28/30 days) to cycle that energy out of your own energetic field and out of your psyche and body. (maybe this is why periods are so painful for a lot of women ... they are constantly cycling out energy that is
uncomfortable/abusive/addictive/destructive). IF we perpetuate that energy (keep having sex with the man that is disrupting our own energy field) we never get that FULL 30 days to cycle him out of our body.

I tell clients of mine who are "addicted" to a man to step back for an entire 30 days (I actually say, look count the first day of your period to the first day of your next as the measure of time) without going into the above paragraph. Some women don't "get it" but they get the "month thing" much easier. Those of them who actually adhere to it, do become different in 30 days.

This really rings true. Keep your body safe, do not allow yourself to defile it for anything other than the relationship you truly want.

Selfishness and Manifesting

I truly believe in manifesting, although I do think it makes people selfish in many ways. They want to know how they can make 'Joe' into the boyfriend they want. How to make him respond better and treat her better and be more affectionate, loyal, loving, faithful. In short they want Joe's body but not Joe. Not who Joe is fundamentally. They want a new improved version. They claim to love Joe with all their hearts. This is not love. The Bible defines love this way. (NIV version)

4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Look at Joe, really look at him, he is probably some hapless guy just trying to enjoy life. Thats the man you fell in love with. If Joe is not meeting your needs or expectations you need to walk away or accept him for who he is.

Let's say you want marriage and Joe cannot see himself married and tells you so. Is marriage your heart's desire? You need to honor your hearts desire. Tell Joe you are honoring him and walk away. Will it hurt? Yes.
It also hurts waiting five or six years for something that never happens.

There is a balance in love.